You asked for more, and so here it is! Another edition of Confessions from Real Moms about Kids, Parenting, and Being a Mom!
I am a screen time mom. Guilty as charged. Mostly my son watches stuff with some educational value. Sometimes certain shows drive me insane though (Lookin’ at you, Calliou) and he will ask to watch them and I will tell him they went “night night” and he has to watch something else. I will then give him less annoying options.
When I told our kids that we’d sold our house and would be moving across town in a couple of months, I used it as an opportunity to ditch the Elf on the Shelf. I told them he was assigned to us because it was his region, but now that we were moving, he wouldn’t be visiting us anymore. He might continue to visit the new kids that live here and wouldn’t that be so wonderful for them? I’m sure my husband will totally sabotage this when the time comes.
I love Valentine’s Day, Easter and Halloween because I eat all if my son’s candy!
I always tell my husband I’m going to take a 5 minute shower, and be right back out to help with the kids, but in reality I take my iPad and go online for half an hour, and then take a 20 minute long shower.
When my kids catch me sneaking a piece of chocolate to eat, I tell them mommy needs to take her medicine to help with “cranky-itis.” (They never ask for any candy when I do this, and one time I had a child pat my leg and tell me he hopes I feel better soon). Haha!
I recently purchased a new mini van and splurged for the parking assist features. The front bumpers of every car I’ve ever owned attest to my inability to swing a car in and out of a parking spot. My husband knew the minivan would be a problem but I INSISTED on it. Besides, that’s what the parking assist features are for! That is if you pay attention to them. A few months after we bought it I was pulling into a spot and misjudged the alarms blaring at me…I ran into a pole with my front bumper. I “forgot” to tell my husband that night. Didn’t matter. He saw it a few days later and asked me what happened. I pretended like I didn’t know, and suggested the bumper might have gotten scratched on a snow bank after the last snow storm. I’m pretty sure he didn’t buy that.
My son is going through a stage where he is suddenly “hungry” every night before bed. Even if he’s eaten everything in sight all day long. Its a stall tactic. Oddly enough, we seem to “run out” of whatever snack he HAS TO HAVE. It saves us from an argument, and he will go to sleep. #momwin
On more than one occasion I have fed my twins left over cold pizza for breakfast.
I have lied to my kids saying we were out of cookies so they would stop asking for them every other second
I tell my husband I have to go to the bathroom when I don’t always have to so I don’t have to change a diaper
My husband thinks it’s weird to leave our son in his crib when he’s awake, even if he’s not upset. But as stay at home moms know, sometimes you just need a moment to yourself! Every morning when my husband leaves for work, my son is already awake in his crib waiting for me to come get him. My husband assumes that I get him up right then, at 7:30, and start our day – but in reality, I take at least 15-30 minutes to myself. As long as he’s happy in his crib, I take some time to drink my coffee, go to the bathroom in peace and do whatever I please. When my husband is home on the weekends, I get him up at the time my husband thinks I normally do and he doesn’t know any different!
I have a granny confession. I aid in the raising my 3 grand daughters so their mother and I like to get the pint size jugs of Tru Moo and tell them it’s Vodka or an adult beverage and they can’t have any. They know it’s milk, but think we added more. lol gets them every time.
This is the 4th edition of this series. Check out the others:
For more hilarious mom confessions, you can also check out The CINNAMONMOM
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Thanks for reading!