The bond between a mother and her child is pretty amazing. There is nothing like it. As moms, we knew that baby before anyone else in the world. They knew us from inside to out. Its a pretty incredible feeling, and something that nobody can take away. However, as your baby grows and becomes more independent, that feeling may start to fade. Here are some tips for creating an unbreakable bond with your child.
Have a Special Treat
This is something my son and I do a lot. Its one of our little rituals. If he is extra good in his class, or if he waits very patiently at the doctor, or helps me out around the house, we have little reward. His treat of choice is French fries. So we will make a special stop and get our French fries. A friend of mine and her daughter have a ritual that they will get ice cream and sit outside to eat it. This is nice on a couple of levels. For one, it is positive reinforcement for extra good behavior. Second, it shows your child that you appreciate the effort they put in to going the extra mile. It is a good way to cement a bond.
Have Lunch Dates
When you’re little, even the small things can be big. For example, my son and I have weekly lunch picnic dates. When the weather permits here in Michigan, we will have them outside, usually in our yard. During the colder months, we have them inside with a blanket on the living room floor. This helps show your child that you are there with them. The change in routine and having a fun time just the two of you can mean a lot to a child. I know that there are times when I have a million things to do. There’s a million loads of laundry to wash or fold, dishes to be done, errands to run, and all that can really pull my attention away from my son. So this small ritual of just making some time just for him has really made a difference. He gets so excited for our little picnics.
Have a Routine
Just like with the lunch dates, this can create some designated one on one time for you and your child and strengthen your bond. Maybe in the morning you can snuggle up on the sofa and watch a cartoon together for 30 minutes. Or perhaps you choose a period of time in the afternoon to play a game together. My son really enjoys reading, so our routine together is reading some books before bed. I let him pick out a couple of books he wants me to read, and then we climb into his bed and read them together.
Make Up a Special Game
My son loves to make up games. He can make a game out of anything. The thing is, he associates certain games with certain people. For example, Grandpa is the designated person to play cars, or firehouse with. Dad is the wrestling and rough-housing guy. My child is fire truck and fire fighter obsessed. So he and I made up a game that just we play together. When we are in the car, we pretend its a fire truck and we are heading to a fire to rescue someone. We even make the siren noises, which he thinks is hilarious. Something so simple is so exciting for kids. This is our little bonding game we play.
Make a Secret Handshake
This silly little ritual is really fun. My 3 year old knows how to high-five and recently learn how to fist-bump. One evening he was showing off his skills, so I showed him how to high-five and then fist bump. He thought that was cool and it snowballed into this 7 part secret handshake that only he and I know. Its something that’s just for us. We do it all the time, and he loves it.
Any Little Thing for Just the Two of You
These are just some examples of the things my son and I do together that help create the tight bond we have. I’m sure you could come up with a million more. The point is to get on your child’s level, spend time, do what they love, and make it special. If you can do these things, it will help cement that mother child bond.